The reverend's gossipy wifeEdit
Alberta is the catty, judgemental and gossipy wife of Reverend Lloyd Meechum. As a church leader, she was well-known in her parish. She was a former president of the Church Ladies League, or the CLL. She was also stuck-up by virtue of her strong position in the church. This allowed her to somewhat control her husband. Because of her nature, she was considered Thelma Harper's nemesis.
They had a very bratty grandson named Eugene (aka Little Eugene), whom she spoiled unabashedly, and allowed to misbehave so dreadfully. Whenever he did anything wrong, she would simply sit there and smile a smile "like butter wouldn't melt". During one Sunday, she decided to foist the unwilling Eugene on the even more unwilling Harpers. She said that he wouldn't be no trouble. Famous last words! In this, she was dreadfully wrong. The trouble he unleashed on them was terrible.
Among his crimes, he doctored Thelma's stew with a whole bottle of Hot Sauce; locked Vinton Harper and Bubba Higgins in the garage; tormented Vint's wife, Naomi Harper; ruined Thelma's best tablecloth; wrecked a gift of Iola Boylen's; ruined Thelma's downstairs bathroom, by spraying a whole can of Vint's shaving cream; and tying up Thelma during the night.
Even with all the proof of the crimes he committed, Alberta refused to do anything about Eugene, thinking that anything he did was perfect. In short, she tried to turn things around on Thelma by trying to blame her for all that happened, even though the idea of the Harpers babysitting Eugene had been Alberta's idea at the outset.
When Eugene kicked Lloyd in his broken leg, that was the final straw. While Thelma grabbed him when he tried to run for it, and held him in place; Lloyd finally spanked the unruly child as he deserved, to Alberta's horror.
When Thelma made an attempt at an unprecedented second term as president of the Church Ladies League, the conniving Alberta, presumably in retaliation for Thelma helping her husband punish their grandson, did everything in her power to stop her, by putting up Iola as a candidate, and nearly destroying Thelma and Iola's friendship. As it turned out, neither of them won, both defeated by Lolly Perdue, the only member of the CLL strong enough to separate the two squabbling combatants.